The Church of
Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints has explained how their leadership
successfully runs the affairs of the church. This explanation is a detailed
description of how councils are run in the church.
- · Councils are always run from an agenda
- · This agenda is always given the evening before so thought can be given by the attendees
- · The people present express love for each other upon arrival at the meeting
- · They open with a prayer in which they ask the Holy Ghost to be present during their meeting
- · Each item on the agenda is addressed
- · People in attendance are able to express their thoughts and feelings on each matter
- · Each member tries to feel the Spirit about the item being discussed
- · When unity is being reached, a summary is given
- · If there is a need, there is further discussion and then the council votes on the matter
- · There must be complete harmony and unity with the vote for it to pass
Within this
council there are some important lessons and principles that we can apply to
our marriages and our families.
The brethren
show love and concern for each member and we can do that within our marriages.
We are told in the Doctrine and Covenants that “The decisions of these quorums . . . are to be made in all righteous,
in holiness, and lowliness of heart, meekness and long suffering, and in faith,
and virtue, and knowledge, temperance, patience, godliness, brotherly kindness
and charity” (D&C 107:30-31). This
is a perfect description of how we should handle serious discussions and
decisions that we have within our marriage.
The brethren
practice proper communication. They handle each item on the agenda and they do
so “efficiently and effectively” (Ballard, 2012, p. 51). “I have noticed that
each of the brethren is not so much concerned with expressing his own point of
view as he is with listening to the point of view of others and striving to
create a proper climate in the council meeting” (Ballard, 2012, p. 51). They
practice proper listening by making sure that they are not forming in their
minds what they are going to say. Communication experts teach us that we are
not to listen to respond but to listen to understand the others point of view.
This is just as important in marriage where the person we are listening to is
the most important person in our own plan of happiness.
Before the
brethren implement any plan, they make sure that all attending the council are
in agreement with the decision made; only then is there implementation. This
does not mean that they do not have their individual opinions and ideas, because
they do. It means that they have come to an agreement about what is best for
the whole and what the Holy Ghost has told them is the correct decision. This
is vital in our marriage councils. Both husband and wife must discuss their
opinions and seek for the direction of the Holy Ghost and both members must be
in agreement before implementation.
The reason we
are to have councils within our marriages and also within our church are
because they gives us, “ongoing solidarity and strength” (Ballard, 2012, p.
48). It gives us knowledge of the Lord. “If these things abound in them they
shall not be unfruitful in the knowledge of the Lord” (D&C 107:31).
Knowledge of Lord in any circumstance makes it better.
Ballard,
M. R. (2012). Counseling with our councils: learning to minister together in
the church and in the family. Salt Lake City, UT: Deseret Book.
Covey,
S. R. (n.d.). Quote of Life, Inspiration and Motivation. Retrieved March, from http://www.inspirationboost.com/
Pratt,
O. (2009). The Doctrine and Covenants of the Church of Jesus Christ of
Latter-day Saints: containing the revelations given to Joseph Smith, Jun., the
prophet, for the building up of the Kingdom of God in the last days.
LaVergne, TN.: Kessinger.
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